Most of my interactions with people are wonderful. I have wonderful friends. An amazing family. Loving in-laws. A great spouse. Caring co-workers. But every once and a great while, I will have an encounter that is stingingly un-great. Like a screaming ball out of left field they hit with impact and without warning. Someone’s words or actions slice. And slice deep.
Every now and then I have an encounter of the not-so-great-kind.
I must admit that I haven’t always been amazing at handling hurt. In the past if someone hurt me, my first was inclination to lash back, and to leave no prisoners. I knew I had a sharper tongue and a quicker bite, and in effort to protect myself I would attempt to wound my victimizer(s) heartlessly. I would shut-out that friend completely. Locking my heart down so that they could never get close enough to see it again. These interactions never went well, and the friendships surely never ended well.
Over the years, I have come to handle woundings in a different way, where God is my chief referee in a game I won’t win otherwise. David, a man with plenty of enemies, slanderers and victimizers understands and gives light to our issue. In Psalm 37 he writes:
Do not fret because of evildoers,
Be not envious toward wrongdoers.
For they will wither quickly like the grass
And fade like the green herb.
Trust in the Lord and do good;
Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.
We will all be given wounds. An email will come in with a biting tone. Eyes will be rolled in our presence. Our joyful “hello” will fade into oblivion as a curt reply is said in return. A co-worker will ignore us. A gossip chain may include your name. A passerby will disregard our personhood. A spouse won’t take the time. A friend will defy our hearts and wound us deeply.
We will all be given wounds. What we do with that wound, though, is up to us.
David writes simply to not “fret” about the evildoers in our life. Not fret meaning, while the hurt is still there, our job is not to worry about their outcome. Instead, our job is to carry the wound to Jesus. More succinctly, David writes, after we have been victimized, to “dwell” in the land of faithfulness. Just because we are hurt doesn’t mean we hurt in return. We dwell in a higher plain. With a higher call. David says simply, even when others do harm… do good.
Wounds, it would seem, speak more of the wounder than they do of the wounded. Now when I am hurt, I immediately carry my hurt to Jesus. I don’t lash out, but instead I give space, and forgiveness and a care for that person they most likely don’t deserve. I do this because I care about them, but I also care about myself. I want my heart to be free of malice and free in general. And so I dwell in higher places, and I care for those who are uncaring.
Lastly, I leave the results to Him.
God says that if I delight in Him, despite the current circumstances or people, that He will be the carrier of my future. The injurers in my life aren’t my fortune-tellers unless I allow them to be. Not only that, but according to David, things never turn out well for the injurer. If I want God’s blessing, I don’t injure back. I pray, I delight, I forgive, and I honor. I dwell in the land of faithfulness.
May you be a blessing to others in your life. May you care and honor in all circumstances. May your heart be defined by His love. And when encounters come of the not-so-good-kind, may you dwell in the higher places.
Be a creator of wonderful encounters.
Jessie Davis 